Something new ...

From 20090620-Marysville

I haven't posted much here since the blogging month effort. Arlene is starting a new endeavor of becoming a Seafair Parade Marshall (SPM), thus I now have a new endeavor.

I will be documenting the various parades we attend through photos. Our first parade was:

Marysville 2009 Strawberry Festival

I haven't decided where the best place will be to post the photos, so for now I will use my Picasa web albums. Here some of the parade's photos. In addition, I have posted a photo series on The Pirates of Treasure Island

As we progress through this new adventure, I plan to create a photo album book of all the parades we attend.

Enjoy.

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February 2009 - WANT: Last post - I did what I wanted this month.

I am still determined to be cheerful and happy, in whatever situation I may be; for I have also learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispostions, and not upon our circumstances.
Martha Washington

Well, there you go. One month of blogging on the theme WANT. In fact, I made sure to pick the shortest month of the year to increase my chances of success a tad bit. Yes, I even checked to see if it was a leap year, so as to make absolutely sure that no one slipped in that extra 24 hours which only benefit women searching for husbands, calendar makers and hourly employees. Instead of writing 30 posts or an exhausting 31, a mere 28 postings were produced. Now, I of course "wanted" to do this project, but being naturally lazy, I wasn't going to be an over-achiever and inundated everyone with 31 pieces of useless trivia and minutia! No, no, not me! A piddling 28 would do just fine. And I am sure no one even missed the other three.

The month started out normal for this introverted, analytical, computer geek. That's right, I made a list of all the topics I would write about throughout February. But once again, my lazy nature reared its sleepy eyed head and limited the list to only 26. What would I do for those last 2 days? I really wanted to complete all 28. Then it came to me, I could do a summary last post. Perfect, I had 27 now. What was I to do? I needed, I wanted, 28 on the list so that each day would be on auto-pilot. See the title, be the title, write the title's post. Alas, it was not to be. One of this past month's posts was done without planning, without forethought, without a Google search.

Can you tell which one it was?

No, it wasn't this last one. Pay attention, I just told you that already!

Enough of that, back to the post. This month was truly an experience. It gave me a fresh look at what I want, how I view the world and relationships and of course what I want next.

If we stop wanting altogether, we would never achieve anything.

True. But what the Buddha says is that when our desires, our craving, our constant discontent with what we have and our continual longing for more and more does cause us suffering,then we should stop doing it. He asks us to make a difference between what we need and what we want and to strive for our needs and modify our wants. He tells us that our needs can be fulfilled but that our wants are endless - a bottomless pit. There are needs that are essential, fundamental and can be obtained and this we should work towards. Desires beyond this should be gradually lessened. After all, what is the purpose of life? To get or be content and happy.

I keep coming back to the post on "to have more, want less". There exists a conflict with that statement. Why isn't it "to have more, want more"? The conflict is easily resolved by the rationalization of "by always wanting more, you will never be satisfied with what you have". Hmmm, then why isn't the phrase "to get more, want what you have"? This would take care of the issue of lack of motivation. If you "want less", then wouldn't you be satisfied with less then you have and therefore never strive. Here is where this want themed month came into play.

In February, I did what I wanted to do.
In February, I was content with what I was doing.
In February, I did less than any other month.
In February, I did not want to do more.
In February, I was happy.

This may be one of those moments when my brain bends around a corner just a bit differently than everyone else's brain, but in February:

I did exactly what I wanted.
I wanted less than in any other month.
I feel I got more than any other time.
Therefore by wanting less, I got so much more.

Perhaps, it is a simple life to be satisfied with what you have and enjoy the moment. It doesn't means that you don't strive.

Do strive.
Do dream.
Set goals.
Challenge yourself.
Have desires.
Have passion.

Remember to be in the moment.
Revel in what you have.
You have so much!

This is what I gained by writing this month. That's a ton!

Thank you NaBloPoMo.

P.S. Have you really noticed how often we use WANT and its other forms?

Here is a list of all my posts for February's WANT theme.

1. My favorite month of the year!
   
2. To get more, want less
   
3. Want versus need
   
4. Want versus should
   
5. Do you really know what you want?
   
6. Do you really know what others want?
   
7. The perspective of want
   
8. The guilt of want
   
9. The judgement of want
   
10. An adult's view on want
    
11. A child's view on want
    
12. The definition of want.
    
13. Must we resolve conflicting wants?
    
14. The phrases of want
    
15. Desire, need, passion and want
    
16. The relative nature of want
    
17. TED - Talks Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi: Creativity, fulfillment and flow
    
18. Want and Now
    
19. Does want change history?
    
20. Be careful what you wish for, you may not get exactly what you wanted.
    
21. Do the people of the world have the same wants?
    
22. How should others react when you ask for what you want?
    
23. Obama's addres to Congress
    
24. Why haven't I asked for anything I want?
    
25. Want what you have
    
26. Asking for What you want
    
27. How can we have what we want?
    

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February 2009 - WANT: So you have everything you want, now what?

It's a helluva start, being able to recognize what makes you happy. Lucille Balll

I have now rambled on across these last 26 days. Some days I missed posting, some days I missed the point, but always I did what I wanted to do.

Let's say for argument sake that you have everything you want. Now what?

Did you find yourself? Are you now happy or at least happier?

Some interesting "wanting" quotes -

“Home is a place you grow up wanting to leave, and grow old wanting to get back to” John Ed Pearce

“Success is getting what you want; happiness is wanting what you get” Ingrid Bergman (Swedish born American film and stage Actress, 1915-1982)

“Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are” Kurt Cobain (American Musician and Singer of the grunge rock band Nirvana. 1967-1994)

“I do not read advertisements - I would spend all my time wanting things” Franz Kafka (German Writer of visionary fiction, 1883-1924)
“It's weak and despicable to go on wanting things and not trying to get them” Joanna Field (English psychologist, b.1900)

“Winning is not everything, but wanting to win is” Vince Lombardi (American Football Coach, national symbol of single-minded determination to win.1913-1970)

Wanting something is not enough. You must hunger for it. Your motivation must be absolutely compelling in order to overcome the obstacles that will invariably come your way.” Les Brown (American Author, Entrepreneur and motivational speaker)

“We may think there is willpower involved, but more likely… change is due to want power. Wanting the new addiction more than the old one. Wanting the new me in preference to the person I am now.” George Sheehan (American physician, author and running enthusiast, 1918 - 1993)

“When you can't have what you want, it's time to start wanting what you have.” Kathleen A. Sutton

So you have everything you want. Now what?

Retire! Go to some tropical island, sip fruit laden drinks, soak up the sun, be pampered and enjoy not wanting.
You know what? I listened to that sentence over and over. Everything was fine up until "not wanting".
If it read Go to some tropical island, sip fruit laden drinks, soak up the sun, be pampered and enjoy, all was good. By adding just the "not wanting", it really made me feel uncomfortable. Maybe it's just me. Perhaps I haven't dealt with ALL my insecurities or issues, but that "not wanting" just felt wrong.

I think that not wanting more things may be okay, but not wanting at all is not living.

I have been told that the definition of love in Buddhism is wanting others to be happy. I don't know if that is a fact.

Yet that seems to square okay with the Second Noble Truth?

The second truth is that suffering is caused by craving and aversion. We will suffer if we expect other people to conform to our expectation, if we want others to like us, if we do not get something we want,etc. In other words, getting what you want does not guarantee happiness. Rather than constantly struggling to get what you want, try to modify your wanting. Wanting deprives us of contentment and happiness. A lifetime of wanting and craving and especially the craving to continue to exist, creates a powerful energy which causes the individual to be born. So craving leads to physical suffering because it causes us to be reborn.

Perhaps that is what is next on that tropical isle, with drink in hand.

Rebirth.

And a little pampering!?

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February 2009 - WANT: How can we have what we want?

It seems like the "want" flows around the same point over and over again. That point is we want some things, we strive to get these yet we always appear to want more.

Are we never satisfied with what we have?
Absolutely correct!
We are never satisfied.
We always want more.

As I mentioned before, wanting and having are both states of mind.
If you think you want more, then you do.
If you think you have everything, then you do.

How bizarre! How bizarre!

I know for a fact that I do not have the answer for everyone to: How can we have what we want?

For me, I have what I want. As I get more each day, I am amazed. Of course, others who see what I have would go, "he doesn't want much".

They would think:
My car wasn't the coolest.
My house wasn't the largest.
My job wasn't the highest paying.
My bank account wasn't big enough.

But I am fine with all of these.

Bottom line:

Decide on what you want.
Ask for what you want.
When you get what you asked for, enjoy it.
Then, look to the future for what you want next.
Rinse and repeat.

What more could you have? What more could you ask for?

Manifest plainness,
Embrace simplicity,
Reduce selfishness,
Have few desires.

Lao Tzu

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February 2009 - WANT: Asking for what you want

Someone, alone, cannot always get what they want. Sometimes the want exceeds their capability. A quick example is the want of a new car. Without help you basically can't create a car on your own. You need the auto industry to build it, the car dealers to deliver it and in many cases a bank or credit union to assist with money.

In this example, things are fairly obvious, you must ask others for what you want. No one questions the why and how of these requests. Now, when it comes to other wants the way to ask for them is not so obvious. The who to ask isn't always apparent. In some cases the asking someone is actually kind of scary. As to the how, well that gets even more dicey. In certain situations it isn't "good form" to ask for what you want.

Let's look at at couple of examples. First, you want a raise for the work you are doing. If you work for a specific boss you probably know "who" to ask, but not always "how". In some places, asking for a raise is not acceptable. Each of us who have worked for others have experienced some form of the who and how dilemmas.

Another example is when you are in a relationship and you want something from the relationship or would like to change a perceived issue with the relationship. Once again, the who may seem reasonably obvious, but maybe not. The other person in the relationship might be who you would ask or maybe some intermediary is needed. Not always apparent, depending on the issue. The bigger item is the how. This is a delicate balance of timing, sensitivity, understanding and maturity.

For me, I can't say with any certainty that I know the best way to handle any of these requests for wants. All I know is that if you never buy a lottery ticket, the odds of winning are much, much lower. I believe this holds true for most wants as well, if you don't ask for what you want, your chances of getting it are much, much lower.

Guess I really didn't help much with this post. As the month rolls on, I am finding far more questions than answers. Good luck.

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After seeing Obama's address to Congress...

I didn't know the words that Obama was talking about when he mentioned the inscription over the House of Representatives, so I looked it up. They are:

Let us developed the resources of our land, call forth its powers, build up its institutions, promote all its great interests and see whether we also in our day and generation may not perform something worthy to be remembered.
—Daniel Webster

If only we and they would have recalled these words over the past decade, perhaps our current catastrophe could have avoided. At the least, it might have inspired the honest ones.

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February 2009 - WANT: Want what you have.

This may be a lot like the "get more, want less" post, but not exactly. In the United States we have tended to have a wide range of choices of "things". As the economy goes into the toilet, the choices are becoming less. Not a whole lot less, just a little less.

Have you ever wondered what life would be like if you had what you wanted and just decided that was it? That you simply have what you have and stopped wanting more.

I don't know that this would be a good thing. Or, maybe not. Maybe you could focus on relationships or health or helping others. Perhaps it isn't all so black and white. People who have wanted things, have in some instances become the biggest philanthropists. Does this mean that if you have more, you are willing to share more.
Some times you see people with hardly anything giving to those in need. Maybe it isn't what you have that lets you share. Maybe it is who you are.

Hey, maybe that's it. Maybe it doesn't matter how much you have,but rather who you are. Maybe having is actually being.
What if, wanting more is fine?
What if, wanting nothing is fine?
What if, what you have is fine?
What if, just being is having it all?

Could it be that wanting is a state of mind?
Could it be that having is a state of mind?

Is being happy just a state of mind?

So may questions. Wish I had all the answers. But there I go, wanting again!

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